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Jerrod Johnson: A Witness to History

NinjaSkillz

Deadliest Photographer On The Planet
Staff
A/V Subscriber
I found this earlier and thought it was compelling...

October 4th, 2010
Crop Circle And Basic Math Puzzle Cleveland County Residents



NORMAN (AP) - Cleveland County residents were puzzled this weekend by the discovery of a fresh crop circle, according to local news sources. The design, roughly 60 yards wide and 80 yards tall, was discovered by a local man near the town of Norman, in a marijuana field just outside of the college town.

In addition to the crop circles, local residents are also highly confused by the concept of simple addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. Regarding the crop circle, however, there is no division in the community on where they think it may have come from.

"That's some f______g E.T. s__t, right there man!" reported Zed McCloskey when asked where he thinks it may have come from. "I come out from behind my meth laaaa...I mean my storage shed over yonder there and I seen them marks over there in that field. I'll tell ya' what, no I ain't not never seen nothin' like this here before in my whole life."

When asked about his thoughts on basic math, Zed replied "Whuuuut?.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................BOOMER!!!"

After making the discovery, Zed reportedly asked his father, Jebediah — a specialist in unexplained phenomena — to take a walk with him to look it over.

And Jebediah reportedly said the crop circle is "authentic."

“Them markin's is huge," he told the AP. "It ain't made by no man. When I stand there in the middle of it, I feel so g____mn sad. I wanna cry. No man would make no markin' of somethin' that make ya' feel so helpless and depressed. Like your soul is leavin' yer body. Like all yer hopes and dreams just got crushed in front of ya' like a Skoal can."

When asked if he noticed anything unusual before the design appeared, Jebediah replied "Naw sir, but I do think they may have probed me while I was sleepin' last night."

The owner of the field said he will harvest the marijuana in 9 days, but the circle will remain because he is enjoying the attention he's now getting for the first time in his life.