Random Thought of the Day Thread

Well, I ain't f-ing OR marrying Oprah, and Martha Stewart would probably make me sign a pre-nup, so you think the answer is obvious (see El Gato quote). BUT, assuming Gail is a package deal with the big-O, and knowing that dried flowers can REALLY get on my nerves certainly complicates matters. Does one of the three have a terminal disease? Cuz that would have to be factored in (you know, a mercy killing, or conversely, a mercy f*#k). This is either too much to contemplate or I'm running out of space, so I'll just go along with the majority.

Out of the three you (hopefully) are going to marry your wife. So basically, it comes down to the big questions of: If you absolutely have to. Which one would you fuck out of Martha and Oprah. I can't stand either of them but Oprah absolutely gets on my every last nerve. Plus Martha looks like she has a little bit of sassy bitch in her, and who doesn't like that in the bedroom every now and again. AmiRight?

...heading off to Disney World tomorrow!!!...

That feeling when you sell back your books and you feel happy to get money back but pissed that a $100 book is now worth $2.

If you are not part of the solution then you are part of the precipitate.

I'm turning 26 in July. Thanks for the hope.

Who has the heart to not help an endangered monkey like this??

Someone please tell me how I can un-read this article.

I read it and was shocked that someone didn't just give the little shit a good squeeze to shoot the peanut out. Otherwise that things gonna die. Gorging on monkey butt is not on the bucket list.

I've had 17 tacos today and I am no way ashamed.

Just got a new tube of toothpaste this morning. The paste is white with orange gel stripes. Now my problem is it makes me want to brush more but I am worried about running out of this awesome color combo.

And baby girl, what does it matter where your purse from?
Your hair done, your nails did, your ass fat, but you’re dumb!

Mmmmmmm.... $40 burger

...actually, the stuff is pretty reasonably priced...you save even more on a dining plan...besides, a macaroni and cheese hot dog (with bacon!) is worth it's weight in gold...

Right click, copy, paste, and print.

I thought this ^ was a decent explanation of why young and old react differently to some of life's situations.

Awwww yeah!!!! J!!!!O!!!!B!!!! Yes!!!!

I'm assuming you got a job as a police in some nice inner city?